Wow ~ ~ Really???
So, I haven't blogged in forever. I mean, really, like forever. The last few days have found me dying to sit down and profess some of my feelings and what my heart is telling me that needs to get out.
Chad has moved to South Carolina (Charleston) and started his new job with Sports Medicine @ the Old Naval Base with the Homeland Security Training Department. Big change for him and I am proud of how well he seems to be handling the transition. We are here in Manhattan, and will be here, until the house sells. The kids are doing ok, although with Connor's autism, we are seeing some significant changes in behavior that both we and the school are trying our best to stay on top of. If there is one thing we have been blessed with, it is a great support staff here to help us in Connor's autism diagnosis and their efforts to help with progression, not regression. We are doing FaceTime with Chad every other day or so and that helps the kids ~ just hanging on like we need to.
I need to say this ~ I need to get it out. None of us are born programmed the way others might want. We all have different beliefs, interests, morals, things of importance, etc. Chad and I transitioned to the Catholic Church a year ago after many months of Catechism classes, study and completed with our coming into the church, which included my first and only water baptism. I hold strong to those beliefs for myself and hope that I can instill those beliefs in my children and family in years to come. Even though I made this transition and professed my beliefs, I understand at the same time that we as human beings are all unique with our own beliefs, values, morals, etc. In my heart, it is not for me to judge others at all ~ point blank, PERIOD. If someone has a conviction for change, that is a calling they feel led to, just as I did concerning my Catholic faith. If we all weren't unique and from different cultures, backgrounds, countries, etc., what a boring place this earth would be.
With that being said, I will just say this and end my post. I love my family. I love my husband and 3 babies more than I could ever, ever put into words. I am raising my children to be openminded, respect themselves and others. This includes learning to respect others beliefs, even if they happen to be different than the ones taught at home. There is nothing my children could ever do that would make me love them any less or bring them into my life with open arms at any time. I understand that many believe in "Tough Love". Not my bag ~ sorry, y'all. In my heart, I believe whole heartedly that you can be a respected parent and also try your best to maintain a close and personal relationship with my children. Maybe it is a difference in my generation, maybe it is a difference in me ~ either way, I don't care. That is what my heart tells me and others may laugh and say ... just wait .... you haven't seen anything, yet. Say it .... doesn't mean I will agree or comment. I am done with that. Respecting others also means learning to respect others even when they choose not to give me that same respect.
To use a well known phrase, I didn't fall of the turnip truck yesterday. Although to some I will always be a child, I am a soon to be 37 year old (Oct 29th) woman that believes in what I do, say, act on, and even (oh my goodness) illustrate my values to others, but I have feelings all at the same time. Respect me or not, I am choosing to respect you because that is what I would want my children to do.
To say it plainly, if you love me, you love all of me. You respect me and don't ask me to quiet myself because it bothers you. You don't ask me to change because it may embarass or be an inconvience to you. My beliefs come from where I have been, where I am going, and where I hope one day my children can or will be. I love them unconditionally and that will never ever change.
To all that read this, thank you for spending a little time to read my, well, call it what it really is, a vent. I love each of you more than I could say and whether we are close now or at some time were, you are reading this because you made or continue to make an impact in my life. Thank you. Thank you for making my life better by knowing you.
We are all equal in God's eyes ~ and that has been and will always continue to be good enough for me.
