So, I remember hearing the phrase "Pretty Is, Is Pretty Does" about 4 million times ~ even every now and then I hear it these days or find myself passing it onto my daughters. My mother, my Grandma Rosie, and even Mom Walker all carried these words of wisdom and they have been passed down through generation to generation, and I suspect, will contine on down the line. Here's my issue ... the last few weeks I haven't felt like acting very "pretty" and I am having a hard time wrestling in my heart and mind over those five little words.
Connor's midday busdriver has been less than pleasant since the first day she brought him home, and that is putting it mildly. I won't type out all the issues because even I am tired of them running through my head, but, just trust me when I say she has not been the least bit nice to deal with. We have had lost backpacks (which is pretty tramatic for a child with autism), open bus doors that he runs out of and I am lucky he runs to our fence and not the car coming in the opposite direction, and most recently, a slide down the stairs of the bus before I could grab him as his feet hit the cement. I have called everyone I know to call, yet the behavior on her part continues and I hit this point where I just feel at a loss as what to do. Chad says let it go .... my heart says no ... he is our son and whether he has autism or not, no 3 year old can advocate for themselves. After speaking with the Special Education Director for our district today I felt better ... I told her I wanted to send letters voicing my concerns and carbon copy them to the Transportation Dept, the Special Education Dept, The District Autism Director, Stonehouse Learning Center (his prek program) and finally, the school board. I just don't get it ... why is it ok for one person to continually exhibit bad behavior and poor judgement at her job, when if anyone else did the same thing, most certainly we would be explaining or fixing our faults if they had not already caused us to be terminated from our employment. I told the director that my husband says to let it go, don't cause anymore problems for Connor .... she paused for a moment and said that I wasn't creating a problem, only trying to finally find a way to fix the problems that have continued since August. I guess I say this because sometimes I just get tired of trying to be "pretty". I hear what everyone tells me to do, but I think that my heart is beginning to realize that sometimes being pretty means listening to your head and heart all at once and deciding what is best for you to do. Momma knows best ... sometimes and sometimes not. But guess what ... it's all a learning process and I guess that trying to be pretty is always a work in progress.
On a different note, I am stoked about going to hear a presentation by Dr. Temple Grandin tomorrow evening at Kansas State. Dr. Grandin is autistic and didn't speak until the age of 3, was told by her parents to be institutionalized, and by her mother refusing to listen and go with the norm, she raised a daughter that has taught the world so much about autism and livestock development that she is world renowned. What a loss had they listened to what they were told .... I guess her mom wasn't being pretty when she decided to go against the advice of medical professionals and family and act in what her heart told her was best for her little girl. As I type this, I think I realize that Pretty is, Is Pretty Does means so many different things in so many individual situations.
I think that I will continue to hang onto the phrase and keep it tucked away, as I surely will continue to tell my children that Pretty Is, Is Pretty Does in the future. I guess it will be up to each of them to decide what that means, but for me, I think my meaning is a little deeper than I ever would have thought when I first heard those five little words.
Not much more to say for tonight ... could go on, but we all have our 2 cents and like my mother-in-law always says .... With that and a few dollars (these days of course) that might get you a cup of coffee. Notice the word might .... a few dollars and 2 cents probably doesn't include a latte or mocha, but maybe sometimes a cup of strong black coffee is all that we really need.
Have a good week, y'all :) !
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